This is America, and we don’t restrict our battles over people’s sex lives to 11 months a year.

Journalists ask me, ‘Why don’t you ever talk about sex in your performances?’ True, I don’t talk about sex – not in my personal life and not in my professional life. This is modesty.

Whether people choose to have same sex relationships or relationships outside the marriage – whatever happens between two consenting adults should be purely their business, not the state’s or the society’s.

Love is a four-letter word, but you don’t hear in nearly as often as you hear some other four-letter words. It may be a sign of our times that everyone talks openly about sex, but we seem to be embarrassed to talk about love

In the duel of sex, woman fights from a dreadnought and man from an open raft.

That’s just great. She gets dinner and Dixieland and laid. And I get mosquitoes and no beer and… not laid. How could this get any… [alligator surfaces and growls] LET ME FINISH… worse. You ruined it. You ruined the moment.”

There’s this idle feeling that settles when the day’s work is done and you just want to ride around on a bike. That’s the time for sex.

Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex, you thought of nothing else if you didn’t have it and thought of other things if you did.

Sex is the consolation you have when you can’t have love.

If it wasn’t for pick-pockets I’d have no sex life at all.

My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.

If President Barack Obama wants me to allow marriage for same-sex couples in my country (Zimbabwe), he must come here so that I marry him first.

Every theory of love, from Plato down, teaches that each individual loves in the other sex what he lacks in himself.

Sex without love is as hollow and ridiculous as love without sex.

Don’t explain computers to laymen. Simpler to explain sex to a virgin.

Sex, whatever else it is, is an athletic skill. The more you practice, the more you can, the more you want to, the more you enjoy it, the less it tires you.

Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.

The four most overrated things in life are champagne, lobster, anal sex, and picnics.

As selfishness and complaint pervert and cloud the mind, so sex with its joy clears and sharpens the vision.

Sex and art are the same thing.

It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased

One of the things being in politics has taught me is that men are not a reasoned or reasonable sex.

We must recognize that beneath the superficial classifications of sex and race the same potentialities exist, recurring generation after generation, only to perish because society has no place for them.

I consider sex a misdemeanor, the more I miss, de meaner I get.

Sex is emotion in motion.

To call woman the weaker sex is a libel; it is man’s injustice to woman.

Love and sex can go together and sex and unlove can go together and love and unsex can go together. But personal love and personal sex is bad

I think same sex couples should be able to get married.

I think of going to the grave without having a psychedelic experience like going to the grave without ever having sex. It means that you never figured out what it is all about.

An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than sex.

Chastity—the most unnatural of the sexual perversions

I feel that flip-flops are the downfall of many relationships. It’s, like, first it’s the flip-flops, and then it’s the sweatpants…it’s the gateway drug to no sex.

I write about what I know: sex, pornography, art, fame obsession, drugs, and alcohol. I mean, why would anyone care to listen to me if I wasn’t an expert in what I write about?

Eroticism is like a dance: one always leads the other.

I’m inspired by fashion. I’m inspired by the moonlight. I’m inspired by sex and pornography and slasher films.